Suffer Little Sophomores

I was involved in some kind of altercation after school. Thinking back I'm not even sure what happened. I was walking around with Eddie Dillon during G-6, waiting for Christian. We walked back into the building via the president's entrance. It's where all the people who wait for mom and dad or the bus to come get them after school. It's actually kind of a sad sight - a mass of underclassmen trying to find their place, talking to people I know for a fact they won't be friends with next year (because that was me, too).

So we're walking past these sophomores and the ugliest one says something like "...he fucks Mrs. Diemer." Mrs. Diemer is the librarian and my journalism teacher and we do not fuck. So I asked if he was talking about me and he said yes, "you are a snitch." And I said how do you mean. I honestly didn't recognize this fucker, something that goes for (no superiority intended) 90% of underclassmen... I don't have classes with them and chances are they aren't worth my time. This has been proven (case in point: ***e **l*******) before. He said that I told on him to Mrs. Diemer for talking back or something in the library which is probably true. I kind of do that when the library gets too rowdy during study hall. It sort of pisses me off when people disrespect Father Pileggi blatantly and think they're cool for showing Mrs. Diemer or Mrs. Manuel attitude. Plus, I'm just trying to relax in my cubby and read. I don't need a bunch of jackass losers playing paper football, making bad jokes and yelling out anatomy.

Naturally, I was pissed. It has been a bad week between disappointment, ugheartbreak, service stress, drama with Eric Austin and external band beef. Eddie and I made it into school relatively unscathed but I was fuming. Sophomores have been giving me lip all year and I do not understand why. Sam Farley, this redhead pimply wrestler fucker tries to make like Christian and I are homos. He said that he thought my balls were still in my chest because the way my voice sounds... yeah because it's really high-pitched and all, right? But this isn't about him.

Later we walked back out the president's entrance and I screamed "I HATE sophomores!" It was liberating. The same kid was still there, not mattering, and he called me a snitch again or something. I told him how cool that made him, calling me names. And just like, what a clever idea the whole fucking thing was. I think I screamed about how much I hated them some more, walked away and called Christian. I think they gave me more lip and I fumed verbally and called them jackasses because they are and left it at that. It felt good but frustrating. I've kind of always made myself a target but I think overall that's a beneficial thing. I've convinced myself that somehow, that makes me more human. And the way you make yourself a target at my school is pretty much by expressing your opinion. So these are the relatively mundane things that are the cause for such ruckuses at my school:

On dress down days, I wear tight pants. But all that means is that my jeans aren't from Rocawear and they can't fit more than one of my legs into one side...
At band battles, I play "obscure" songs... ones you really have to dig crates to find. Virtually unknown bands like Pixies, Dead Boys and White Stripes (note the sarcasm).
I'm a socialist.
I read books in the library during study hall.
I take journalism which means Mrs. Diemer and I are friends and collaborate on work... people don't understand how nice that woman really is. She knows your name. Yes, you!
When women come up in class discussion I sing their praises rather than objectify them or rag on their driving skills.
I wrote an article instructing people to stop listening to prog rock like Rush and Led Zeppelin and instead to check out the Kinks or the Streets.
I praised Hanson in a review of their show I saw.
I wear a plaid blazer that actually fits.
I don't drive myself to school.
I don't think my school is anything special. People are always hating on Archmere or St. Mark's or Tower Hill for the same exact reason people hate on our school: stuck-up rich kids.
I don't mind speaking my mind and honestly telling it like it is. Like when I tell Billyjack that I hate him in English class or kick Matt Dougherty's desk because he's a prick. Or when I scream nonsense like "I hate sophomores!"
etc, etc, etc...

So, should I regret such acts of impassioned ridiculousness? I don't think so. It's not like I go out of my way to be different... all of that stuff flies in normal environments. This year too I've been like branching out and building relationships with um, I guess the popular kids or more accurately, leaders of the pack. For example, members of the soccer and hockey teams, random potsmokers... All it is is proof that I'm living, breathing and thinking. Should I think I'm better than most people I see every day because I act more human than them (or so I think)? Stop me before I get too narcissistic...

Obama rally Sunday, Rodney Square in Wilmington with the man himself! 1:15, but get there wayyy early. That means all of you pinko liberal slime! Pussies! Kidding...

What does it mean when I leave a girl a message telling her things that aren't secrets so much as they are emotional revelations and apologies/ramblings and she saves it? Does that change when she plays it for a female confidant? Or does that reaffirm the idea that she thought my message was important?

I'm really excited for the live debut of the newest incarnation of T.V. Dinner which, in case you haven't heard, is Mimi, Trey and I. We share most of the duties and have a lot of material to play with. At the same time I'm nervous/feeling weird about playing for a girl I've never even met! But it'll be exciting and hopefully it'll fly that four more people are coming with us that I didn't tell her about yet... Happy birthday to Mariah! It'll be nice to meet her, haha.

Will you listen to the song "I Could Be Dreaming" by Belle and Sebastian? Isobel Campbell dreamily reads a passage from Rip Van Winkle at the end and it's kind of sexy. I don't even know what she looks like.

All you need to know about tonight was that it was great, great great fun and I know wonderful people. Tonight included Matt Foulk, Anna, Robert, Mimi of course, Miles and Garrett all watching Final Destination 3 (links to a really awesome .gif) and Urban Legend, having free-reign over the kitchen at various points in time and laughing at at least one large man. Our movie nights are the best thing going. They often include bad teen slasher movies of the late-20th and early-21st centuries, coffee and/or tea, pizza, my parents, my dog Lucky, YouTube, hollering at the TV screen and importantly, lots of laughs that of course help build tight friendships. Haha, it reminds me of something real live television characters do. Is that sad, that that reminds me of that? Is it also sad that I write this? I don't think so, I have to express how much fun I have in my life which more than cancels out the easy frustration of the school week...

I love everyone that isn't in the class of 2010 or 11! Motherfuckers!

P.S. Tonight, I screamed ohmyGOD a lot.